Under The Influence

reclaiming my childhood

A personal and brutally honest account of the destructive dynamic that a drug affected and mentally ill father can have on his child.

Zachary gives us a sacred peek into his once shattered mind, teaching us that, even against all the odds, a broken mind can not only be healed, but can go on to flourish, inspiring others along the way.

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Under the Influence is the story of my childhood. It provides an insight into the reality of being the son of an addict, paranoid schizophrenic, chronic hoarder and drug dealer.

For as long as I knew him, my dad dealt. Every day, a procession of desperate, malnourished and volatile addicts would visit our house looking to score. From a child’s perspective, they seemed to have only one goal - acquiring their next high. Growing up in this environment had a profound impact on my life and world view. I never felt safe.

- Zachary Phillips

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  • ★★★★★

    “I could not put this book down. Reading about the trauma and suffering Zac endured as a child and how he coped and went on to help others was amazing. Until I read this book I had limited understanding of the impact that parental mental illness and addiction can have on a child. It is both a story well told as well as a self-help book. This book would be really helpful for teenagers who are currently in a situation similar to what Zac's was, showing that they are not alone and that there is hope and help out there for them.”

    - Amanda, C

  • ★★★★★

    “This book is Zachary's account of his earliest memories of a life wrought with an abusive, drug addicted father. Life for Zac is surreal as he presents an honest truth, insightfulness, sad albeit very inspiring true accounts of his early life. Zachary reclaimed his life and broke the cycle of abuse and addiction and has become a dad and husband himself. I encourage others, teens, parents, teachers, and counselors to pick up this must read book and share it.”

    - Holly, W

  • ★★★★★

    “Thanks for sharing your story Zac, it's incredibly sad and uplifting at the same time. As someone who lived through moderate neglect in a hoarder house, a lot of this book resonated with me. I'm so sorry for the things you went through, it does make us stronger and more capable but it also makes trusting relationships so much harder. I wish you all the best and truly believe that you will put your child's needs first.”

    - Emily, D

  • ★★★★★

    “I gained a lot from reading this. I learnt how much impact drugs and mental illness can have on your life and the lives of your children. I learnt how parenting is a huge responsibility and if taken lightly, can have long lasting and sometimes potentially deadly consequences. Most importantly, I learnt that although your childhood may be scarred with adversity, there is always someone like Zachary who has beat the odds and come out on the other side. These sort of people you can learn a lot from. I highly recommend this book!”

    - Liam, B

  • ★★★★★

    “Really good read which I couldn't put down. The author gives an insight into his childhood being brought up by a father who was an addict and a dealer. It is sad in parts, whilst also showing some humor in various situations. Very well written in a style which reflects the author’s struggle with mental health. Be prepared to enter a world that many of us will be totally unaware of. Would recommend it to anyone interested in how others experience life.”

    - Aaron, T

Under The Influence: Reclaiming My Childhood

Genre: Autobiography
Word Count: 27, 952
Page Count: 127
Published: 2016

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