The sense of self is an illusion.

When we introspect, we see that there is nothing stable to hold onto. Our moods, thoughts, desires, behaviours, and opinions constantly change.

“Who am I other than constant change?”

Turn the camera inwards and observe for yourself. Watch the thoughts come and go. Notice how you did not choose the thoughts that came, nor the thoughts that replaced them. They just appeared and disappeared of their own volition. Watch, and see how emotions, memories, moods, and other mental phenomena arise.

Where are they arising from?

Attachment theory proposes that the relationship that forms between a parent and a child can significantly influence the dynamics of that child’s long term interpersonal relationships. The infant’s ability to develop trust in their caregivers will influence their relationships for the rest of their life.

Attachment theory further suggests that how an infant is raised will actually change the internal narrative of the child, the way they look at, judge and observe the world. This carries on into adulthood and will colour every interaction and event. How they view connection, love, and life are all skewed based on the narrator that lives within.