I am not in the best way ATM, but unlike previous times I have felt this way I have made a different choice.

Rather than choosing to inebriate myself, I chose not to. I recognised how I would feel during and after the inebriation, and how I have previously felt and made a different choice.

So now I have been left to sit with the pain, but also to recognise that my pain won’t last (because it never lasts).

I can take good actions:
- I followed my crisis plan
- Undertook self-care
- I prioritised my mental health
- I focused on the good

Coffee is a drug, but unlike prescription medication it’s not given any respect. This despite the fact that we consume it to alter our mental states.

I practice ‘strategic caffeination’ - specifically choosing when to use it, and abstaining at other times - just as I would with all drugs.

Coffee is a useful tool, but over use reduces its effectiveness and causes anxiety.

“It wasn't until I was in around grade three that I realised exactly what was happening. On practically every car trip that my father took us on, he was dealing”

- Listen to the entire chapter here

“I realised just how bad Dad's living conditions were about a year after his death. I was talking to a cousin of mine who had recently become a police officer. It’s not often that you get a chance to have a firsthand glimpse into the seedy underbelly of the society you live in ... “

In this episode, I share Ch 3, of Under The Influence - Reclaiming My Childhood,

It is a real challenge to overcome addiction - it involves far more than simply ‘not using’. In this episode, I elaborate on that challenge as well as provide some advice for those who want to quit (or make any positive change in their life)