Chase the Feeling, Not the Outcome
What Moves You?
What moves you?
What do you enjoy?
What do you wish existed?What puts you into a state of flow?
What do you do for fun?
Focus your efforts there.Money, fame and rewards may come.
How much is enough? Always more.A fickle dream that can never be reached.
Thus, you will never be satisfied.
Instead, you should embrace the process.Let your actions speak for themselves.
Let the art take center stage.
Open yourself to the muse.Let it work through you.
Let it guide your hand and
Buttress you with self-imposed disciplineSuccess is an internal state.
No level of external reward
Can replace your inner truth.So have fun.
Lean into the projects that bring you joy.
Make your work another form of play.
There is a temptation to make money the goal of our worldly pursuits. To make a certain income level, or amount of accumulated assets our life purpose; one that becomes the benchmark of our performance and subsequent happiness. Until reached, we have not yet ‘made it’ and thus cannot be satisfied. The problem is that if your goal is purely financial, attainment will feel like a hollow victory. This is because after a certain point, more money does not bring more happiness.
“Money, fame and rewards may come,
How much is enough? Always more.
A fickle dream that can never be reached.”
Research puts the ‘happiness’ cap at around $75,000, varied for location, inflation, and familial circumstances. Why is this the case? Intuitively there is a feeling that more is always better, and indeed almost everyone feels that way. Yet from a purely happiness perspective, once you have reached your cap, more money does little to impact happiness.
After a certain point more money has little functional impact. Once you have a house over your head, a car to take you to work, enough food to survive, as well as some left for a small safety net and the occasional holiday, having more money would not drastically change your life.
If the income of someone at their cap doubled overnight, what would change? They would still need to work, so time wise they are just as committed, so instead they upgrade their lifestyle. Yet these upgrades do little to impact their functionality.
Once you have a car that works, what does a better car actually give you? A Toyota does the same job as a Ferrari. Both get stuck in traffic, both can take you to work and back, both can be used for shopping and running other errands. True, one is more desirable, but attaining it does little to change our day to day life. This same logic can be applied to your house, holidays, and gadgets. Once you have a certain level of attainment, the changes in functionally are almost non-existent. The top of the line phone is almost identical to last year’s model. A $50 shirt does the same job as one costing $200. A Rolex tells the same time like any other watch.
Happiness comes from you, not stuff.
When your income rises, so do habits and expectations. You have more, so you spend more. Yet, you are still you when you go on that holiday; you just happen to be staying in a fancier hotel, eating more expensive foods. You are still you when you use that new phone or step out of the sports car.
It is impossible to buy your way to happiness, no matter what the advertisements tell you.
“Thus you will never be satisfied.
Instead, you should embrace the process.”
As a species, we are very adaptable, but seldom satisfied. Because money can be converted into almost anything, we have a primal drive to always want more. Over time, as your income level increases your tastes increase alongside it, and suddenly that amazing figure that once seemed out of reach, will quickly become run of the mill. When you reach the financial level you were aiming for, your satisfaction at doing so will not last. You will have become accustomed to it and will soon set your sights on higher luxuries. The goal posts will be forever shifting, and as such you will remain unsatisfied.
Imagine that your goal was to have one million in the bank, and that you were currently $1 shy of that mark. Would you be unsatisfied? Would getting that $1 make you exponentially happier? When you get it, would you suddenly feel as if you had made it? What if instead of being $1 shy of the million, you were instead $10, or $100, or $1,000? At what point would your happiness significantly change?
Look up the countless stories of exorbitantly wealthy people who, despite their millions, are desperately unhappy. Now take some time and interact with people who are on a regular income yet are nonetheless loving life. Up to a certain point, money will make you happier, beyond that amount however, its impact is minimal. The sole pursuit of money over everything will not lead to satisfaction.
Remember the last major purchase you made. You were looking forward to it, super excited about how amazing an addition it will be to your life. And when it came, you did feel great; you finally have the thing! But soon your mood dropped. You had a sinking feeling that this new thing could be better. You start noticing the issues, and second guessing your choices. You worry about keeping it clean and safe. Then you start fantasising about your next potential purchase.
Possessions cannot satisfy the soul. There is always more that you can buy. Always.
Would you prefer to be exceedingly rich and unhappy, or surviving but incredibly happy? This is a false choice of course, you can be both rich and happy, provided you focus your efforts beyond mere material attainment.
“What moves you?
What do you enjoy?
What do you wish existed?
What puts you into a state of flow?
What do you do for fun?
Focus your efforts there.”
It is a question of values. What do you want from this life?
Often we set the financial goal first as a stop gap, because we believe that if we attained that magical figure, we would have the time and space to consider what we are doing with our lives. This is a fear response, one that has the potential to take our best years. The truth is that we may never reach our financial goals, yet the pursuit will cost us time that we can never reclaim. Deathbed regret is often caused by a misalignment of actions and values.
What would you do once you made it? Would you start a family? Write a book? Enter a competition? Study? Start a hobby? Run for government? Is it possible to do those things now?
Money is the ultimate safety blanket. It provides protection and gives us the illusion of happiness. But the reality is that no matter how much money you earn, you are still you. You will still have to act on those underlying values if you want to attain true happiness. Therefore, it seems prudent to detach and work out what those values are, and whether you can start living by them now. You may find that a value driven life is within your reach, and that the cause of your current unhappiness was not the failure to reach your financial goals, but rather the failure to act in accordance with what you truly value.
“No level of external reward
Can replace your inner truth.
So have fun.
Lean into the projects that bring you joy.
Make your work another form of play.”
This chapter is from the book Reflections Of The Self: The Poetry, Insights, and Wisdom of Silence
